Friday, June 8, 2012

Silver lining

My first cycle doing an IUI was a learning experience.  I really didn't know what to expect, aside from the science parts.  My doctor wasn't particularly forthcoming with information regarding when things would happen, aside from "we'll keep track of your cycle closely with ultrasound."  Therefore, I was a little stressed about timing.  When would Michael NEED to be here for his part?  He was working with some contractors to finish up the house in Iowa for renting, but he needed to go up and do the last little bit himself.  Should I worry about the size of my follicles after my first ultrasound?  They seemed kind of small and a 3-day wait didn't seem long enough to grow big enough for ovulation.  Now, in his defense, my actual doctor was out of town until my final ultrasound - so really it was the other doctors and his staff that were unintentionally keeping me in the dark.  When I asked about timing, all they would tell me is: "It'll happen when your body is ready."  I wanted to beat someone for a few days there (might have been hormone-related, but I doubt it). 

Notes for the future - the IUI is going to occur most likely around day 13 or 14 when using Femara.  Michael only needs to be involved on the morning of the procedure itself, as the sample must be fresh.  Go into the office needing to pee, as it apparently helps with the ultrasound during the procedure and nobody told me about it.  Wear socks - while the office is not cold, laying on the table for 10 minutes causes your toes to feel like they're freezing off.

I had a little cramping after the procedure, and I tried to take it easy the day of, but I couldn't exactly put my life on hold for the next two weeks.  I had to do some cleaning around the house (the kitchen is DONE, I'm so happy), I had a class for three days down at Ginger's, I was co-autocrat for Namron Games... life must go on.  Over the following 2ww (two week wait), I analyzed my body for any symptoms of pregnancy.  Were my feet swollen because I was working hard, or because I was pregnant?  Was that pain in my lower abdomen indigestion, or was it because of implantation?  Was I so tired because I could only catch sleep in small increments, or because my body was using the energy for other reasons?  And toward the end of the wait: Are my breasts sore because I'm about to start my period, or because I'm pregnant?  Anything my body did that seemed even remotely unusual, from digestive issues to headaches to mood swings...

And when I started spotting on Sunday and then bleeding on Monday, I was sad, but not devastated.  See, even while I was doing this analyzing and observing, I really didn't think that I was pregnant.  Somehow I knew going into this cycle that I shouldn't get too excited or hopeful, even though I was going to go through with the treatment.  Then the doctor doing the first mid-cycle ultrasound to determine if I should trigger ovulation noticed a really bright spot on my uterus, with dark points at the ends.  She told me she thought it was an endometrial polyp, but that she wanted Dr. Hansen to verify that when he got back.  Polyps don't prevent pregnancy, but they DO dramatically increase the risk of miscarriage.  After a consultation with my doctor, he recommended I go ahead with the IUI anyway, as the polyp is relatively small and he believed it wouldn't cause a problem.  I really spent my 2ww hoping I wasn't pregnant so I didn't have to live in fear for the next 9 months (hopefully)  that I would spontaneously miscarry due to this polyp in my uterus. 

Tuesday I go in for a definitive test, where they will fill my uterus with saline to verify that it really is a polyp - and then I will have it surgically removed before the end of the month.  This is a silver lining, really.  Once the polyp is gone, I will know for a fact that my uterus is a safe place for my baby to grow when the time comes.  Which will hopefully be after the IUI in July.  ;)

1 comment:

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